A Buhari Job Interview

Applicant comes in for an interview.

Q: What’s your last name?
A: Muhammed Buhari.

Q: Your first name?
A: I don’t have one.

Q: What’s your email address?
A: I don’t have one.

Q: Sir what’s your highest level of education?
A: Level Six, but I don’t have the certificate to prove it.

Q: Sir, how old are you?
A: I’m 73.

Q: Sir, when last did you work?
A: 1998.

Q: Sir, why did you leave that Job?
A: I was sacked.

Q: Sir, did you have employment before that?
A: Yes.

Q: Sir, when?
A: 1984 – 1885

Q: Sir, why did you leave that job?
A: I was sacked.

Q: Sir, so you don’t work, then how do you spend your day?
A: I wake up, pray, then I listen to BBC and VOA Hausa Service, I then walk around my compound, at times I personally tend to my herd of 150 cows.

Q: Sir, what are the last five books you have read to improve yourself?
A: No problem, I read the Qur’an in English, then Hausa, then Kanuri, then Fula and finally Arabic. That’s 5.

Q: Ok Sir, so exactly what are you applying for here?
A: CEO of the company. I want to run your Company.

Sorry Sir, no vacancy for you here.

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