Top 5 Things That Make You Nigerian

Apologies for being quite recently, no fuel to charge my phone. Meanwhile am not talking politics today after all Buhari is drinking Chinese tea at the moment.
I know most of us wish we were born in another country like Chad,Somalia or USA. But here we are under the blazing sun of Nigeria. So how do you diagonize a Nigerian?

 

 

 

 

We talk loud.
Yes!! Whether on phone or face to face we just can’t lower our voices. Even when we whisper, someone sitting 3 rows behind will hear us. It is not our fault we are Nigerians.

We have our time.
Some countries like USA have different time zones. But in Nigeria we have “Nigerian time”. This means that we arrive at any event 2 hours behind schedule!! Ever gone to a Nigerian club by 10pm? You will help the club arrange chairs. Our religious organizations are not left out, I once went for a program slated to start by 12noon, I got there 12:30 and the ushers told me the Pastor that invited me is yet to arrive!!! Just see Nigerian time as GMT +3.

Eye Service.
This is actually in our blood! I remember when I served, the organization I worked with were expecting the State Governor on a Monday, mind you they had not been paid for 3 months! When Monday came they all came to work with their best dresses, the Engineer was even wearing a helmet on a native attire on a Monday! one of them even asked while I was not wearing my 7/7. (NOTE: I served when corpers were not owed Allowee unlike this Buhari time.) I explained that I wear it only on CDs days. They cheered and danced and still their salaries were not paid.

We love to partyyyyyyy.
Although there is a particular tribe well known for this, however, it is a Nigerian thing. We can turn anything into a party. I once went for a funeral of a relative and after the burial the DJ started playing Ashawo by Flavour, before I could say Bia, I was already on the dance floor (let the dead bury themselves right?).
There was a story of a man who bought Keke (read tricycle) and he killed a ram to “wash” the Tricycle. Ever heard of “we go wash am?”. Lol.

We can be friendly (nosy).
It is only in Nigeria that 4 months after wedding people will be telling the couple “we are getting ready for child dedication ooo”. They don’t want to know if the couple have decided to postpone child bearing for now. We can also greet/ask some “reasonable” questions. You are coming back from work and your neighbour will ask “are you back from work?”. Make sure you reply yes, so they don’t take offence.
That is why it is difficult to do an invitation only event, because everybody is related!!

These are my top 5 Nigerian traits, feel free to add yours. ‪#‎myonekobo‬

Nwagwu Everest, A writer that is passionate about Nigieria and Physiologist by profession writes from Lasgidi

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