Office Romance: Deal or No Deal?

Workplace romanceย exists when two members of the same organization develop a relationship with mutual attraction.



I understand that when two people of the opposite sex stay together for a long time, friendships develop and emotions begin to defy control. Much less in the Nigerian corporate world where most organisations do not respect the agreed 8 am -5 pm working hours. Most bosses would assign duties after working hours and expect you to complete same before going home(story for another day).


However, I’m a believer of the old saying “don’t start what you cannot finish”. You see, people develop emotions for various reasons: some genuine while others are selfish.


If you are genuinely seeking a relationship that will stand the test of time, the office is hardly the best place to seek. Everyone in office has a clear goal: to advance their career (in terms of positive appraisals, promotions, leadership opportunities etc). The office is a competitive place: everyone seeks to outsmart their colleagues. Where does that leave Mr/Miss Lovestruck?


No sane person would give up an opportunity for career progression to a colleague, with whom they are in love.


Office romances are a hell of work, especially for the women. The need to protect your territory without appearing insecure, the pressure to always justify positive appraisals (especially if lover boy is the boss), the shame of being tagged a home wrecker (if loverboy is married) etc all make it difficult for a woman to sustain an office romance.


Should the relationship be a smooth sail that leads to marriage, the odds are against the lady still. Some organisations do not allow couples to be on their payroll at the same time. One person has to leave, often times, it’s the woman.


If your organisation allows it, and it is not an academic environment (like a tertiary institution with many staffs where you may not even see each other in a day), then, you are done for. You would have to deal with office gossip of how your appearance hasn’t been upgraded to the married woman’s status.


They know your salary and know that of your husband so they can quickly conclude you are living above your means (even when you have an alternative source of income).


And wait for it, you wouldn’t be able to express yourself without somebody reporting you to your husband. And yes, they will report your husband to you.


Ultimately, prepare yourself when going into an office relationship. Ask yourself pertinent questions like:

Why am I going into this?

What are my expectations?

How prepared am I to handle the challenges that come with it?

What kind of sacrifices am I willing to make to sustain this relationship? ***

Does my goal for this relationship align with that of my partner?

Please answer the questions with honesty before entering that relationship in the office. I wish you good luck.

– BimsInspire … towards a better society


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